Newsgroups: rec.humor.funny From: danny@nicholsn.demon.co.uk (Danny Nicholson) Subject: star wars...pants? Keywords: laugh, forwarded Approved: funny-request@clari.net Path: alphapro.demon.co.uk!news.demon.co.uk!demon!dispose.news.demon.net!demon!news.maxwell.syr.edu!cam-news-hub1.bbnplanet.com!su-news-feed4.bbnplanet.com!news.bbnplanet.com!fugue.clari.net!funny-request Message-ID: Date: Fri, 28 Nov 97 19:30:02 EST Lines: 70 Xref: alphapro.demon.co.uk rec.humor.funny:342 Lines from Star Wars that can be improved if you substitute the word "Pants" for key words: We've got to be able to get some reading on those pants, up or down. The pants may not look like much, kid, but they've got it where it counts. I find your lack of pants disturbing. Many bobans died to bring us these pants. These pants contain the ultimate power in the Universe. I suggest we use it. Han will have those pants down. We've got to give him more time! General Veers, prepare your pants for a ground assault. I used to bulls-eye womp-rats in my pants back home. TK-421... Why aren't you in your pants? Lock the door. And hope they don't have pants. You are unwise to lower your pants. She must have hidden the plans in her pants. Send a detachment down to retrieve them. See to it personally Commander. Governor Tarkin. I recognized your foul pants when I was brought on board. You look strong enough to pull the pants of a Gundark. Luke... Help me remove these pants. Great, Chewie, great. Always thinking with your pants. That blast came from those pants. That thing's operational! Luke.....I am your pants. A tremor in the pants. The last time I felt this was in the presence of my old master. Don't worry. Chewie and I have gotten into a lot of pants more heavily guarded than this. Maybe you'd like it back in your pants, your highness. Luke, search your pants. You know it is true. Your pants betray you. Your feelings for them are strong. Especially one... Your sister! Jabba doesn't have time for smugglers who drop their pants at the first sign of an Imperial Cruiser. Short pants is better than no pants at all. -- Selected by Jim Griffith. MAIL your joke to funny@clari.net. If you mail to original@clari.net, it makes sure that your joke is tagged as your original work, Always attribute the source of a joke, whether it's you, or somebody else. For the full submission guidelines, see http://comedy.clari.net/rhf/